Clarity- still looking for it

Take a line from a song that you love or connect with. Now forget the song, and turn that line into the title or inspiration for your post.

Kind of didn’t take the exact content but kind of worked with it. Trying to find a path in life. Trying to discover myself. Wanting to make a connection. I think the human connection is something very important to me but something I forgot. Moving to a new country, starting a new job and basically changing everything can have that affect on someone I suppose. 

Except it just depressed me- well, after the honeymoon period. Now, in a way, I’m trying to get back to me. Back the basics. I was trying to live up to an ideal (still am in a way) that, now that I think about it, I was doing it for ‘imaginary’ people I wanted to impress. 

I have always been so afraid of being judged by other people that I have been letting it rule me. Rule me to the point that it was a serious form of stress. So, to stop tormenting myself, I submitted my paperwork to leave school and take a breather. Not a breather to be lazy, but to realign myself and come to the understanding that I am more than a degree. Another Master’s won’t make me a ‘better’ person. 

There has been to much living in the future and missing the present. Missing the people who matter now and who’s lives I’m suppose to impact now. Hopefully this can be my first step towards that. 

It’s a difficult path but one worth looking into. Being curious about. 

I have to recommend TED talks to everyone. They really have changed my life. 

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